Showing posts with label Idiots. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Idiots. Show all posts

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Idiots Who Are Deathly Afraid of Wi-Fi Have Found a Town in West Virginia That Bans Wireless Signals for 13,000 Square Miles [Wtf]

Idiots Who Are Deathly Afraid of Wi-Fi Have Found a Town in West Virginia That Bans Wireless Signals for 13,000 Square MilesI always thought it would be a hilarious conspiracy if all the wireless signals that invade our invisible space was really screwing with our health. I wasn't serious though! These people are—they avoid Wi-Fi like the plague.

"My face turns red, I get a headache, my vision changes, and it hurts to think. Last time [I was exposed] I started getting chest pains - and to me that's becoming life-threatening"

That's Diane Schou, she's one of the 5% (!) of Americans who think they suffer from Electromagnetic Hypersensitivity (EHS). Symptoms of EHS include skin burning, muscle twitching, chronic pain, etc. and is caused by exposure to cell phones, Wi-Fi and other electronic devices, basically they're allergic to modern life. I don't mean to demean other people's beliefs and/or health problems but...

What the fuck.

Schou's husband, bless his heart, built a Faraday Cage for her to live in—it was a wooden frame with two layers of wire mesh and a door that could be sealed shut. All the more better to block out the signals, you know? That's where Schou spent much of her time before she found her safe haven: Green Bank, West Virginia. Green Bank is part of the US Radio Quiet Zone—wireless signals are banned 13,000 miles across to prevent interference with the giganto radio telescopes in the area. Green Bank is slowly emerging as the destination du jour for these Wi-Fi 'fraidy cats—no one carries cell phones, no one uses wireless tech and people can breathe now!

According to the BBC, dozens have flocked to the area and are now able to live a normal life. As normal as crazy people can get, I guess. [BBC via BoingBoing, Image Credit: Rob Wilson/Shutterstock]

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Saturday, August 27, 2011

Why Do Idiots Keep Trying to Outrun Speeding Trains? [WTFriday]

Why Do Idiots Keep Trying to Outrun Speeding Trains?Well, it was a big week for morons and trains. There is clearly some kind of locomotive Darwinism at work, but miraculously both of these dipshits survived. We hope these serve as a warning to not ever be this stupid.

We don't know much about this kid other than that he is extremely lucky to be alive. Was he trying to do some parkour stunt? I do not know. He hops right up after the train rushes by, but it looks like it could have a limp. I wouldn't be surprised if he'd broken his foot. Stupid! [Break via BuzzFeed]

So, we actually know a bit about our second genius. This Australian kid is 12-year-old. He spots a cutie on the opposite platform. He crosses over to chat her up. Suddenly, he sees what he thinks is his train coming, so he tries to run back across to beat it. It's not his train. It's a through train; it's not going to slow down. He doesn't make the jump, and he gets pinned between the train and platform. By some divine fucking miracle, he isn't killed. He does, however, end up with a broken leg, a broken elbow, and some nasty cuts.

This raises two questions. One: Where does a twelve-year-old have to be that he can't afford to miss his train and be a little late? You don't have to risk your life, kid, the Hamberg Helper can be reheated. And two: How gorgeous must this young lady have been to warrant a kid doing something this stupid? Unless she looked like Beyonce in her new video, it wasn't worth it. [The Telegraph]

If there's a lesson that can be learned here, it's don't be a fucking idiot and dart in front of a speeding train. Mmmkay? Mmmkay.

Image credit: Getty Images/Sean Gallup

You can keep up with Brent Rose, the author of this post, on Google+ or Twitter. Related Stories

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Governor Chris Christie to Idiots: Get The Hell Off The Beach [Video]

Governor Chris Christie to Idiots: Get The Hell Off The Beach People of New Jersey loitering on the beaches! Your Governor Chris Christie has some very good advice for you. Stop working on your tan and get the Hell off the beach! That goes for you too, Snookie!

This is why we love you Chris. Sometimes. [YouTube]

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